I am not kidding.

At 8:17 this AM I got an e-mail from my agency asking me to call them after 9:00. This has never happened before. I thought something was wrong. Read yesterday’s post. We are in the middle of update paperwork so about a million things ran through my mind.

Then we had a security emergency at my office. This sort of thing happens more frequently than it should. I am legally restricted from going into details, but it distracted me. When that was all over I looked at the clock: 8:57

I found a quiet place and called. (In a room sourrounded my sterilized dental equipment) Now it is 9:03. I Called.

“Are you ready to be a Mom?” My Caseworker Asked.

Yes. I am ready. I am so ready. I have been waiting, wishing, working and hoping for over 4.5 years and today…it looks like it is FINALLY going to happen.

We have our referral! It’s pictures, it’s cryllic writing, it’s blue stamps. IT’S OUR REFERRAL!

It Came. It came when I least expected it. It came when I wasn’t looking for it. It came without me seeking it out. It came, SHE came, to me all by herself.

The only downside is that it is for 1 child. We were hoping for 2. Alas, this is what fate has in store for us and we are absolutely thrilled/elated/ecstatic/excited/nervous. I am going to be a mom. I am going to be a Mom. I AM GOING TO BE A MOM!

Everything is perfect and completely unexpected. My daughter is 23 months old. Much younger than I had really ever realistically anticipated. We have only preliminary information on her medical and developmental issues right now, we will get the officially translated information on Monday, but she has lighter needs than we ever thought we would be referred. For the biggest shock of all: My daughter is NOT in an orphanage. As a former foster mother I was delighted to learn that my child is currently placed with a foster family!

I have a photo. My 1 precious photo. She is Amazing. She is perfect. And oneday, someday soon she will be here with me. I quite simply cannot wait.

So yesterday when I said I was waiting 8 months I was mistaken. I think we were matched during the 261st meeting of the IAC that took place on (I think) October 9th. If I am right, then we waited 7 months and 2 days from Dossier Registration to Match. And although it felt like an eternity, I have nothing to whine about.

So everyone asks me how it feels? It does feel amazing. I just got everything I ever wanted. But this blog is also to document the truth. When I found out I started shaking. Then I cried (literally hard sobbing) for about 5 minutes (I still have no idea why I did that), then I was totally distracted for the rest of the day at work and accomplished nothing meaningful (my boss forgave me), I feel dizzy, I feel drunk, I feel forgetful, I have a headache from all the texting and phone calls…I never really ate lunch because I worked my nerves up into a frenzy and I have diarrhea. And I don’t care. And you might think that all that was an overshare but I don’t care about that either. And if you are wondering what will happen to you when you get your referral (if you are adopting) you will thank me for warning you about the diarrhea.


One response »

  1. Discovered your blog today totally by accident while researching our destination. As I read…the story became hauntingly familiar….lol. Very helpful and enlightening. And I can’t wait to meet her!!!!


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